Only The Kentucky Derby Is More Difficult To Decipher Than NCAA Hoops
By: William F. Reed

LOUISVILLE, Ky. (Apr. 1, 2003) - John Asher's Western Kentucky Hilltoppers lost in the first round of the NCAA tournament (again), Karl Schmitt's Louisville Cardinals lost in the second round (to, ah, Butler), and Madame Wizard's Kentucky Wildcats were missing in action during their regional championship loss to Marquette (so much for the SEC being superior to Conference USA).

So now everyone can toss their brackets into the garbage and concentrate totally on the classic event that already was 64 years old when the first NCAA tournament was held in 1939. We're talking, of course, about the Kentucky Derby, which will be held for the 129th time on Saturday, May 3, at Churchill Downs.

If there's anything more unpredictable than the NCAA tournament, it's the Derby. But the regional finals are coming up in New York, Kentucky, Arkansas, Illinois, and Californa. (In horse racing, it's perfectly okay to have a Final Five).

First up are the Santa Anita Derby and the Illinois Derby this Saturday, the same day the basketball Final Four will be held in New Orleans. If the most deserving teams win -- Kansas and Syracuse, in my opinion -- the final will determine whether the Jayhawks' Roy Williams or the Orangemen's Jim Boeheim will finally get the brass ring.

Along with Eddie Sutton of Oklahoma State, Gene Keady of Purdue, and Bob Huggins of Cincinnati, Williams and Boeheim are members of an exclusive club: Best active coaches who have never won a national championship.

The Derby also has such clubs for trainers and jockeys.

In my humble opinion, the best active trainers who have never won the Derby are Bobby Frankel, Bill Mott, Shug McGaughey, Allen Jerkens, Dallas Stewart, Neil Howard, Rusty Arnold, Kenny McPeek, and Todd Pletcher.

And the best active jockeys who have never won the roses are Russell Baze, Jose Santos, Mike Smith, Mark Guidry, Shane Sellers, Julie Krone, Corey Nakatani, Edgar Prado, and Calvin Borel.

But this year, well, you never know. Who ever thought Tom Crean of Marquette and Rick Barnes of Texas would take their teams to the Final Four? It's just a matter of getting to be your best at just the right time.

Along with "The Whale," our dear friend, Madame Wizard and I recently discussed this Derby mess. Her eyes were bloodshot, either from crying over the Cats' loss or, heaven forbid, a wee too much grog.

Here's a transcript, more or less, of the conversation.

Madame Wizard: "I didn't see anything over the weekend to get me enthused. Even though Inamorato had a good effort in his troubled trip, I just can't justify putting him in the top 10. I do like the fact that he raced in a large field and encountered traffic, which he'll most certainly do in Kentucky, but I don't think this colt is anything special."

The Whale (who tends to speak at jet-engine volume): "That name sounds a little obscene to me, and I feel offended."

Me: "Calm down, Whale. Go ahead, Madame Wizard."

Madame Wizard: "I'm very encouraged by Offlee Wild's work and moved him up a couple of notches. Can't wait to see how he returns."

The Whale: "I used to know a girl named Sopha Lee, and she was pretty wild."

Me: "Be quiet and drink your Boodles. I want to hear what Madame has to say about this Saturday's races."

Madame Wizard: "I'm pretty psyched about the Santa Anita Derby. Looks like it will be very competitive and a solid betting race, with money spread around pretty good."

The Whale: "Atswhatimtalknbout."

Madame Wizard: "You got it, big guy. He's a powerful, long-striding son of A.P. Indy who drilled five furlongs in :58.80 on Mar. 31 in preparation for his start in the Santa Anita Derby."

Me: "I can't believe you're not putting Empire Maker No. 1 in your ratings. You did see the Florida Derby, didn't you?"

Madame Wizard: "Son of 1990 Derby winner Unbridled and multiple stakes-winning mare Toussaud has the look of a colt who'll peak on the first Saturday in May.

Me: "Jeez, I wish you'd stop talking in that stilted Racing Form lingo."

The Whale: "I love President George Bush and everything he stands for. Give me a horse that he would bet on."

Madame Wizard: "Peace Rules, the improving Louisiana Derby spoiler, has shown increased Beyer speed figures in each of his seven starts."

Me: "Beyer, schmeier. I'm a sucker for come-from-behind horses. Give me one of those."

Madame Wixard: "Indy Dancer, a Silky Sullivan-like stretch-runner, is expected to have his final prep in the April 12 Wood Memorial."

The Whale: "I thought Silky Sullivan was a stripper at the old Riney's in downtown Louisville."

Me: "No, Whale, that was Noodles. She knew how to rotate her tassels in a way that made me sigh. Instead of another drink I ordered some caffeine."

The Whale: "Doesn't Baffert have a horse named Caffeine?"

Madame Wizard: "No, Whale, that's Kafwain, a proven two-turn router who will be tough to beat at the Santa Anita Derby distance of a mile and an eighth. But he may find the Derby's 10 furlongs in Louisville beyond his capabilities."

Me: "Hey, watch out there. Baffert is a buddy of mine."

Madame Wizard: "Well, the buddy you need to be thinking about is Buddy Gil, who sped five furlongs easily in :59 at Santa Anita on March 27 under regular rider Gary Stevens. He gives his pilot a serious shot at winning his ninth Derby over that track."

The Whale: "Pilot? What combat medals did Gary Stevens ever win?"

Madame Wizard: " Well, certainly not a Badge Of Silver. Keeneland's traditionally speed-favoring surface should allow him to stretch out successfully in the Blue Grass Stakes if his breathing problem has been remedied."

Me: "When you mention breathing, it makes me think of Jerry Lee Lewis, one of my all-time favorite '50s rock singers who had a hit named 'Breathless.' Who do you think he would like in this Derby?"

Madame Wizard: "Offlee Wild, who sizzled a four-furlong bullet in :48.20 at Gulfstream Park on Mar. 30 and looks like he'll punch his ticket to Louisville with a strong effort in the Blue Grass Stakes."

The Whale: "You know, Keeneland is practically next door to the historic Calumet Farm, which has won a record eight Derbys. It's been 25 years since Calumet had a serious Derby contender. Do you think it'll ever have another one?"

Madame Wizard: "Region Of Merit, a $475,000 yearling purchase has a good mix of speed and stamina in his pedigree and the right running style to be draped in roses on May 3."

The Whale: "And he's a Calumet horse?"

Me: "Whale, my main man, where have you been spending your time?"

Madame Wizard: "Maybe Ocean Terrace, which isn't a bad place to be considering that jockey Kent Desormeaux gave up the mount on Neil Drysdale's Ministers Wild Cat to ride this lightly-raced Bob Hess, Jr. trainee in the Santa Anita Derby."

Me: "You've really got to stop talking in that Racing Form jargon. Right, Whale?"

The Whale: "Have you ever seen a bartender as charming as this one?"

Me: "Goodnight, Whale, and I hope you see Excessivepleasure in your dreams."

Native Kentuckian William F. Reed has been a sports writer in various capacities for 43 years and has missed covering the Kentucky Derby a mere two times since 1966. He has been a high-profile sports writer in Kentucky for the Commonwealth's two largest daily newspapers, the Louisville Courier-Journal and the Lexington Herald-Leader and was a national columnist for Sports Illustrated, covering among other sports, Thoroughbred horse racing and college basketball. Reed currently pens a column for the Louisville Sports Report and covered Kentucky Derby 128 for kentuckyderby.com. He will be filing frequent installments for CDSN's (Churchill Downs Simulcasting Network) websites throughout 2003.

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